So, I’m sitting on a plane talking with this very inspiring young man. What a great chance to ask “what do you think couples need support with?”. As a coach, I love his answer.   Read More...

You know when you’ve goofed up and all you want to do is get out of the doghouse. What next?I sure did not grow up watching great conflict resolution. Quite the opposite.   Read More...

What is it that defines a relationship as healthy? Is it a lack of fighting? How about how close and in touch with each other as a sign of health? The very difficult part of knowing if your relationship is unhealthy or not is that the unhealthy version differs in subtle ways that often creep in over time. What can feel charming and endearing at first can become painful and controlling. I’ve included links to 3 articles at the bottom of this blogpost. They all list signs ...  Read More...

Often in life the people closest to us know how stressed we are before we do. The ironic part about stress is that often our own reaction to stress causes more stress than the original stressor.There are unlimited ways to react to stress and there are unlimited causes of stress. That being said there are some basic principles that we can get to.Let’s start with some common reactions to being stressed:Withdrawing from other - emotionally, socially, physicallyBecoming hyper-focused and drivenBecom...  Read More...

Life is good! You are in love, your relationship is not work, it just flows and spending time together is easy. You are living with your best friend.I hope this all reads true for you, but keeping this or getting back to this is not all easy.What comes easy when we are falling in love takes work and intention as our relationship ages and life gets busy.What are some practices and habits that can protect or re-enliven your relationship as the years pass by?1) Date Night: There is the good old sta...  Read More...

It is one of the most natural things in the world - to tell someone else what we think they should do.We do it out of love, out of concern, because we like to help, sometimes because it makes us feel good, creates a bit of a dependence or respect with the other party. Sometimes we simply want the other person to do things our way.We have many reasons, both good and not so good for giving advice.Usually, nowhere is easier to slip in to this mode than with our life partner.Advice and being told wh...  Read More...

Some of us immediately think sex when we hear the word intimacy but it is so much more. Intimacy is about close, safe, nurturing connection. It includes physical, emotional and spiritual connection. Intimacy at it’s strongest includes all three. Today’s blog is a collaboration with Canadian, Toronto-based artist Veronica Blanco.   Read More...

We’ve all done it. We’ve all made sure that someone else knows that a problem was most definitely caused by them.As Brené Brown puts it: Blame is simply the discharging of discomfort and pain.Blame may relieve some emotional discomfort short term but it is not productive in the long-term or in any other way. It leads to disconnection and what we long for, what we need for well-being is deep healthy connection.So what are the options?Let’s talk about a great foundation for dealing with frustratio...  Read More...

Some things we all have the same answer to. “Do you want to be happy?” is one of those questions. We all want happiness.   Read More...

Recently, during a lunch with a very ‘coach-like’ friend of mine I got to hear my husband answer her very creative question.“How have you changed since you got married to each other 8 years ago?”I think Bill’s answer gives us the best goal posts possible for lasting emotional intimacy.He said: ‘Well, I’ve learned how to be loved, how to let myself be loved, and I’ve learned to love myself better.’Wow.I have to tell you, being married to someo...  Read More...

It’s almost February. You know what that means. Valentine’s Day is not far away.Some of you are likely dreading it.   Read More...